Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Dealing with Judicial Anxiety

Increasingly, even as we become better and being clearer and more precise as to what will help remedy a parental alienation case, it appears to be the case that Judge's often hesitate to follow such recommendations. Very often, the targeted parent will have been accused falsely of being in some way dangerous, unstable or otherwise suspect as a parent. Since the court should always carefully examine any potential danger that such a parent might represent, it should then also recognize that the fact remains that parents are falsely accused of tendencies and acts that are not them. In cases such as these, where such possibility of danger has been carefully vetted and found to be absent, the court should then act accordingly. Sadly, we find that not to be the case very frequently. I believe that a key reason for this is that the second part of the equation involving false allegations is seldom executed.

What needs to happen - and this is the frequently missing piece - is for the case presentation to say essentially, "not only is this parent not guilty of what they have been accused of being, but what is true is that the other parent has affirmatively attempted to defraud the court" by accusing them as being so. When this argument is effectively and strongly made, the court's attention shifts from the targeted parent onto the alienating parent. It is at this point that the lightbulb of insight goes on for the judge and they begin to rule in a more corrective fashion. Absent this step, it appears to me that the judge is left with a lingering suspicion regarding the targeted parent. Therefore, the case presentation must bring the attention back to the alienating parent in a robust fashion. For reasons that I cannot clearly delineate, many attorney's appear to be uncomfortable with this last step, often citing that they want to remain as the "reasonable one". I believe that this is very often a serious error.


Anonymous said...

When we first told our attorney's (there's been 3) about our concern's about PAS with my husband's kids he told us very flat out...It happens all the time. Most courts and judges see it as a he said she said and in the end you can fight it but how it will end is, it's still a he said she said case and your in the hole for X amount of money. After becoming involved in many websites trying to educate ourselves on PAS we are saddened to learn this is the usual case. In my husband's case the PAS started about 3 yrs prior to her leaving him on their anniversary. That's been a couple of yrs now and the kids are completely estranged from their dad. My husband and his ex are both well respected teachers and it's almost unbelievable at what women can get away with today. She can LITERALLY take his kids from him but you let him miss a child support payment!

Steven Burda said...

Great post, thank you.

- Steven Burda

Roberta Matson Underhill said...

Hi Mike .... Can't believe I found you after all these years. Stumbled upon your facebook page, which I liked and left a message on, and that lead me here. Would love to chat and catch up. email me if you wish at Look forward to hearing from you.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure whatbto do